Wednesday, April 28, 2010

So it turns out I get to go after all

Someone up there must like me, because Diana came home from school the other day and told me that her play had been rescheduled. I scared her to death when I yelled "SHUT UP". Not the "be quiet" kind of shut up, the "Princess Diaries" kind of shut up. Or maybe I could have pushed her down and exclaimed an Elaine Benice "GET OUT". Either way it meant the same thing, I was now released from my motherly obligations. And hence I could go to Provo and attend Women's Conference. Woohoo!!!!
This is very unexpected and rather exciting. It would be little more exciting if I had not just spent 9 hours last Friday, driving to New Mexico and another 9 hours on Sunday driving back home. We went to a family baptism which was very fun, but still that is a lot of time in the car.
In any event I unpacked and repacked today. I have stocked the freezer with enough frozen food to feed an army, so hopefully no one will starve while I am gone.
I will not miss all the drama that seems to take place every morning in the process of waking, dressing, eating, and getting in the car to go to school.
It will not be my problem to figure out what people should eat. Glory be. Three whole days of being charge of only myself. How will I ever cope?
This will be my 6th Women's Conference and my fifth in a row. Doesn't it seem like just yesterday I was leaning over the railing to get my picture with sweet, cute Sister Beck? Good good times. I am a little disappointed that I don't have a bigger wish list for stalking this year. Hopefully I will get some good pictures that will be worth seeing next week.
Which reminds minds me, my memory card is full. Imagine the horror of having to choose between deleting treasured family pictures so I could get a shot of Dallin H. Oaks walking into the Marriot Center? Of course it wouldn't be that hard of a choice, but it would be better to download the pictures off the memory card instead of losing them forever.
Don't worry I will eat a brownie for all of you. You can thank me later.

Monday, April 26, 2010

In which my stalking skills have helped someone else in life.

Who knew this picture would inspire someone else on to stalking greatness?

Any of you who love the Cougars go and check out my friend's amazing encounter with the head coach of BYU. You can read about it here.
I am so proud to think that my shining example of stalking has rubbed
off on someone else.
She totally cracked me up when she asked herself WWPD (what would pat do?)

Go check it out, it is a fun read.

Just goes to prove you never know what kind of a
difference you are making in the world, huh?

Who'd have thunk it?

Monday, April 19, 2010

Insider Tips to Women's Conference

I posted this last year, but with Women's Conference just over a week away, I thought some of you might need to read it again.

It is one of my favorite times of the year-Women's Conference at BYU. I have attended faithfully for the past five years. Over the years I have gained a wealth of information on how to make those two days really count.  And I will now share this treasure trove with all of you.   This is a must read for anyone attending for the first time.

DON'T be late to the Thursday morning opening meeting. Every year Mary Ellen Edmunds and Sandra Rodgers put together the most hee-hee-larious videos on the etiquette rules of the conference. It is definitely MUST SEE TV. And as far as I know, you have to be there to see it. It doesn't seem to be rebroadcast anywhere.

DO take the time to get some spiced roasted almonds. They are to die for and taste as good as they smell. Don't pass by thinking you'll get some next time, for they may be gone. Trust me, you won't be sorry.

DO go and listen to classes at the conference center. It is just behind the Marriot Center to the east. They have service station rooms set up where you can work while you listen. It is very fun to edge a baby quilt or color ABC kits. Plus it is not that far to walk.

DO bring lots of spending money. As much as Women's Conference is about soaking up the spirit and eating lots of yummy food, it is about the shopping. Be prepared to shop til you drop with all of the "deals" every where you turn. Check out the tent just outside of the Marriot Center if you don't want to go all the way to the bookstore. From books, music, artwork, to tote bags, good deals are everywhere.

DO plan on standing in lots of lines. You could use this time to read one of the books you just bought, or better yet make a new friend with the person standing next to you. It will help the time pass and nothing says bonding like waiting to empty your bladder with 30 other women.

DON'T forget your camera. This is a prime time for stalking and you want photographic evidence. I like to think of it as Disneyland and the General Authorities as the princesses. Someday I hope to have pictures of all of them.

Don't be afraid to go up and get your picture with any of the teachers. Over the years, I have had my picture taken with Julie Beck, Elaine Dalton, John Bytheway, and Susan Tanner. Besides that I have snapped pictures of Boyd K Packer, Jeffery R Holland, Thomas S Monson, and all of the general auxiliary presidencies.

Try it, it is super dee duper fun. *Portal Q is the best place to sit for stalking opportunities. This is right next to the opening where the leaders enter and leave. It is prime real estate for photo ops.

DO wear your most comfortable shoes. This is not time for making a fashion statement. You will be walking and standing a lot. Don't be foolish, choose comfort over style.

DON'T plan on getting any rest. If you are exhausted and are hoping this vacation will restore your sleep debt the size of the deficit, well you will be sorely disappointed. You can sleep anytime, this is the time for visiting with friends and family and soaking in the whole experience. Thursday activities will go from 9 am to 11 pm. And then Friday will start back up before you know it. Try to come as rested as you can.

DO be prepared for a spiritual feast the likes you don't get every day. Wear your spiritual eating pants, if you know what I mean. Any physical exhaustion you will experience will be somewhat compensated by the spiritual rejuvenation you will feel.

DO eat as many mint brownies as possible. They are manna from Heaven and remember calories don't count at Women's Conference. It is part of the magic.  Not to mention the spiced Almonds.  Equally delightful.

So there you have it, my insider tips. Now go and enjoy the benefits of my experiences.

Your welcome.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Sweet Sixteen

Happy Birthday Jared!

It seems like just yesterday you
were this sweet baby.

Or this irresistibly adorable three year old.

Where did all those years go?

I am certainly grateful
these days are over.

Glad sixteen looks to be
so much better than
fourteen was.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

April Fool's Joke

An atheist became incensed over Christmas holiday preparations. He filed a lawsuit about the constant celebrations given to Christians and Jews while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.

The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the long passionate, presentation by the atheist's lawyer, the judge banged his gavel and declared "Case dismissed!"

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling. "Your Honor, How can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter, and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur, and Hanakkuh. Yet my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!"

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, "Obviously, your client is too confused to know about, much less celebrate his own atheist holiday!"

The lawyer pompously said, "Your honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be?"

The judge replied, "Well it comes every year, on exactly the same date. Psalm 12:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, if your client says there is no God, according to the Bible he is a fool. April Fool's Day is his holiday. Now get out of my courtroom!"