Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Life is Just Nuts

I stumbled upon the following article in the NY Daily News. I am pretty much speechless about it and thought I should share with all of you. Definitely a "What the what" inducing topic. Just a warning, if you are drinking anything, swallow first, before you read. Wouldn't want to be blamed when you spit on your computer screen.

"Real, or fake? Never mind the busty woman walking her dog in the park - it may just be her pooch who's sporting implants.

Some pet owners who neuter their male dogs are opting for a surgical procedure meant to make Fido feel like he's back in the good ol' days B.C. - Before Castration.

Neuticles - testicular implants for dogs that look and feel like the real thing - are said to boost a pet's self-esteem by replacing what was lost. It's a procedure that's becoming increasingly popular in New York.

"We did it so Truman could still walk proudly down the street," says Penny Glazier, a Manhattan restaurateur, of her 8-year-old bull mastiff.
"We felt it would be good for him psychologically," she adds. "He actually still marks trees, though I'm told neutered dogs aren't supposed to do that anymore."

Made from polypropylene ($119 a pair), solid silicone ($249) or a liquid-filled "ultra-plus" model with lifelike veins ($889), Neuticles were introduced in 1995 by Missouri inventor Glenn A. Miller.

Though it took several years for veterinarians to accept the product, Miller claims more than 230,000 pets in 49 countries have been "Neuticled" at 17,000 clinics worldwide. The procedure is performed mostly on dogs, but owners have had it done for cats, bulls, horses, monkeys - even an elephant.

"People like their male dogs to look natural," says Miller. "Neuticles are strictly cosmetic. But it encourages owners who are hesitant about neutering their pets to do it, and that helps reduce pet overpopulation."

Size, by the way, does matter. Neuticles range from petite (.63 inches in length) all the way to XX-large (2.75 inches).

While the operation is safe, not every vet is sold on the idea - especially when it's more about an owner's ego than the dog's. "It is mostly men who inquire about it," says Dr. Gina Antiaris of Miller-Clark Animal Center in Mamaroneck. "I've done [the operation] before, but we don't do it here. It's sort of unnecessary."
"It's really a cosmetic thing," says Dr. Richard Green, who has performed it several times. "Dogs do just fine without their testicles."

For dog owner Edgar Rivera of the Bronx, whose Jack Russell terrier and chihuahua were both neutered, Neuticles was never an option. "Fake ba--s for a dog?" asks Rivera. "That's just nuts."

OK, is it just me, or is this idea ludicrous to the Nth degree? Holy waste of disposable income, Batman. And seriously how do they know that their dog's self esteem is worse or better? I don't get it. And I do admit that I am not a dog person in the least. But I can not imagine spending $900 to improve the self esteem of one of my kids let alone a pet. Good Golly, Miss Molly. Some people's kids. And don't ya just love the last line from the guy that said "That's just nuts." Some people are so punny. And the line about size does matter. Who knew?


Smart Helm said...

Hate to break it to that lady, but I've seen many a pet mark trees, shrubs, anything they sniff, who are neutered! That is the silliest thing EVER. I agree wtih the vet. Putting an animal through pain and suffering they don't understand just for a surgery based on the owners needs... man.

Talk about signs of the times :-)

The Crash Test Dummy said...

ha ha haha ah ah ah aha ha ha ah aha ha ah aha ha ha ha ah aha ha ah aha

oh dear!

T said...

the nuts comment FLOORed me when I read it...

thanks - that is the funniest thing I've seen in awhile!

Barbaloot said...

Oh wow. I'm amazed at some of the things people choose to spend money on!! Then again, I'm with you, and definitely am not a dog person.

Organic Meatbag said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
April said...

They're just doing what's best for their kids....I mean dogs!

Eliza said...