This is what the package looked like before an absent minded 17 year old got a hold of it and put it in my beautiful new microwave. (Cue ominous music usually reserved for horror movies.)
If one was inclined to read the directions and follow them, one might notice that one should add water to the noodles in the package and cook in microwave for 6 minutes.
If one is a 17 year old male, with better things to do than follow directions, one might just put the package in the microwave, hit 6 minutes and walk away, with nary a care in the world.
And when the house fills with the smells of an outdoor camp fire, one might expect one to notice.
And no amount of cleaning, opening of windows, spraying of air freshener, or ranting and raving, made any difference the first day. I finally realized that the smell was in the microwave itself. The inside was permanently stained a golden brown. No amount of bleach even made a dent. And I think the filters and inside were permanently charred.
I tried not to despair that my brand new microwave now smelt to high heaven of burnt offerings. But I was tempted to make some burnt offerings of my own, if you know what I mean.
So here is Diana doing a very nice Vanna impression as we are taking the microwave into Lowes.
Did I mention that by some divine intervention, I for once had purchased the extended warranty on the darn thing? I don't think it mattered, but it couldn't have hurt.
I walked up to the return desk at 8:30 pm and told the girl at the register that I needed to return my microwave. She asked why, and I said because it smells of smoke and I can't keep it. She asked what happened, and I openly admitted that my son had burned something in it.
At this point the manager was called. He asked the same questions, and I was equally open with him. He checked my receipt and because it was less that 30 days, he said they would refund my money.
And so the same guy that loaded/crammed it into the back seat of my car, helped me out with a brand new microwave. And we left the burnt offering back at Lowe's.
It seems to good to be true. But this time, a tragic event has actually worked out to be Okay. Who'd have thunk it?